My face is sore. Very sore. I have TMJ and after my dentist appointment on Friday, I have pain in both sides of my jaw, my neck and a bit of a headache. Eating hurts, but at least it is good for my figure. I don't remember it bothering me so much after the dentist before - but maybe I have just blocked it out. Anyways, I hate to complain about it now - since I have so much to be thankful for. It has been a very busy week. Mike has called me Supermom - which is kind of him to notice. So, I'm sore but I'm happy. My shoulders are feeling a lot lighter this weekend. I just imagine God leaning down, lifting boulders off of me, "Here, let me get those for you..."
I've shown the Webster house and taken calls on the Webster house a lot lately. Regina's housing market is really picking up again. There were some really promising showings last week - and I was sure that they would call again. They didn't. Then I showed the house to a couple around our age on Tuesday night. The realtor was nice, the man was friendly - but the "mom" didn't seem at all interested. After they left, I closed the door and started turning off lights. I had forgot how pretty it is to look out those back greatroom windows and just see open sky and Evraz to the right. It was black outside and the lights twinkled and the smoke and steam lingered above Kat's "Bolcano".
When we had first moved into that house, Kattie was two and she said, "look mommy A BOLCANO!" It was Evraz - Ipsco then, I think. Aren't kids the best?! I cried just for a second. I think all of the pressure was just waiting for me to crack - and I did for a short second. I was also frustrated with the house - it has a great location, it's super clean, it's new, it's finished, and it's priced below value. Why wasn't it selling?! I left the house, went home to my family, looked at Mike and shook my head.
The buses hadn't run all last week, because of all of the the snow. What a pain in the butt. Driving back and forth to school, scheduling Sam's naps & feedings, and normal household stuff in between. Kenzie didn't go to school a couple days - since I had no way to get her there in the beginning of the week. Then later my neighbour friend and I shared kid pick up duties. It helped a lot, but man, am I grateful that buses are running again this week! I had also been trying to get to the other house as much as possible to clean and freshen - so everything was gleaming when I had showings. It's amazing how a house can get dirty with nobody in it.
Wednesday night, we had company and it was really nice to just sit, eat, drink and relax. I believe we were right smack dab in the middle of laughing at my cousin's skiing ability when the phone rang. It was the realtor from Tuesday night. They want to see the house again and then write up an offer! Unbelievable. I didn't want to get too excited, as we had one really low and ridiculous offer already (months ago) - but I was really hopeful. Thursday I had plans with my very pregnant sister in law. I felt bad changing our plans, but I really, REALLY needed to work at the old house before they walked through again. I wanted to line the drawers, especially in the bathrooms, wash the floors, and try to get it smelling good again. The house smelled different - not awful, just different than what I'd like my house to smell - so I was on a mission.
Thursday, Alex (my brother's wife and soon to be new mommy) and my mom came to town. Mom kept Kat and Sam happy and Alex kept me happy. Thank goodness she is nesting! She was the perfect cleaning companion at the other house. We did lots. I was really happy with how it all turned out there. The house looked sparkly and smelled fresh. I had just enough time left over to run to the school, pick up Kenz, feed Sam, get back to the house and show it at 4:30. It was a good thing that I went over at 4:10, because they came at 4:15pm. They stayed for an hour. The couple (and their little boy) looked around and planned on their own, and it gave their realtor and I a chance to visit and negotiate. I gave him my thoughts and he was very receptive.
They left the house happy and so did I. I went home and by 6pm the realtor had called with their offer. It was good. It was pretty much what we wanted and possession was even better - in three weeks! We agreed, he came over, papers were signed and we have a conditional deal. All conditions will be removed by this coming Friday. Then, hopefully, our house will be officially sold.
Finally, Friday arrives. We called a babysitter to stay with the girls - as Kenz had no school. Mike, Sam and I were all anxiously excited to go see Dr. Buwembo. We had the CT in hand, and we were ready. Our appointment was set for 9am. He arrived at 10am. I was worried that I wouldn't make it on time for my dentist appointment, which was at 11. He called us in at 10:10. Dr. Buwembo is tall and very dark - very striking. He is also very kind. He immediately took to Samuel. Sam took to him as well. He thought that he looked better in person than in the scan. He thought that his forehead was nice and wide - considering all that was going on. He wants to see Sam monthly to watch how he is growing. He even thought that by 24 months, if he is growing good by then, we will be out of the woods. We left with great big grins. We couldn't have asked for better.
*I will post a pic of Kat's Bolcano later to this post - after I run to the other house...
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
Will You Come Back?
Every night, after I say goodnight to my Kattie, she asks me, "will you come back?" And every night I tell her Mommy always comes back. She needs to ask so she can fall asleep, and I need to check on her so I can rest too.
Something's itching at my brain - picking away, eating my insides. Is it that I'm just tired? or maybe that I'm feeling guilty about Kenzie not going to school tomorrow since the buses aren't running again. I have some guilts, fears, and anxieties that linger in the back of my mind just waiting for the right time to surface. Sam's appointment is on Friday. I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being afraid. I mean, a little afraid. I am so sick of anyone telling me, "I just have this good feeling that everything is fine". Well good, I'm glad you have that good feeling. I don't. And you, wanting me to say that I do too, will not actually make me have those good feelings. It doesn't work like that. And please don't congratulate me on the "good news" from Calgary. I am very thankful, that surgery is likely not required. But I am still sad, that cranio is still his diagnosis. And if you were grieving, I would never say, "get over it, move on, you are not allowed to grieve anymore!" The terror of surgery is gone, almost completely. I'm even back to eating again, for a few weeks now. Someone asked me, if I can let it go? And the answer is no. I can't. My Samuel, has been diagnosed with something that doesn't go away. Even if he had surgery, he would still have that diagnosis. It isn't something that they can just remove and Tada! He's cured. Nope. It's something that will always be a part of him. It's the way he was programmed to be.
Programmed to be - is how our pediatrician described it to us. How he is made. So, my beautiful bouncy baby boy is perfect just the way he is. Anyone who looks at him can see that. But then there is my brain, that asks questions - that maybe shouldn't be asked. Questions like, his perfect little head is a baby head, what happens when he is a man and it can't grow like the rest of him? Or, how is the pressure and shape of his mild condition going to affect his behaviours and learning abilities. My boy is brilliant - for a 7 month old. And his head is big enough for a 7 month old. What happens if it just isn't big enough anymore? What happens if that time comes? Will the "fine" people say, "oh, wow, didn't see that comin' - gosh that's a bummer." Because I'm wondering and I need to know, if one person - who actually knows what they are talking about - can say to me and promise me, "His head is going to do all the things it needs to and he will never EVER have any disabilities because of his cranio". As Sam's mom - I am asking SOMEONE to promise me this. I think I know what that someone would say to me. I think and I feel inside that no one can promise me this. This is what I can't let go. I can let go of surgery - I almost have. I can't let go of Sam.
Five months ago I worried about getting enough sleep at night - and how the foods I eat will affect my breast milk. I remember trying to decide if I should take a strollercize class with my neighbour. Those days, seem so very, very long ago. Now that I know that there is craniosynostosis, I worry about so many other things that five months ago I never even knew existed. I feel robbed a little bit. I know that many, MANY mothers have it much worse and much harder. I know a few of those mommies quite well. But nobody plans for their child to have a "condition". Can you imagine, filling out your form during pregnancy? Please check a minimum of 2 items:
Something's itching at my brain - picking away, eating my insides. Is it that I'm just tired? or maybe that I'm feeling guilty about Kenzie not going to school tomorrow since the buses aren't running again. I have some guilts, fears, and anxieties that linger in the back of my mind just waiting for the right time to surface. Sam's appointment is on Friday. I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being afraid. I mean, a little afraid. I am so sick of anyone telling me, "I just have this good feeling that everything is fine". Well good, I'm glad you have that good feeling. I don't. And you, wanting me to say that I do too, will not actually make me have those good feelings. It doesn't work like that. And please don't congratulate me on the "good news" from Calgary. I am very thankful, that surgery is likely not required. But I am still sad, that cranio is still his diagnosis. And if you were grieving, I would never say, "get over it, move on, you are not allowed to grieve anymore!" The terror of surgery is gone, almost completely. I'm even back to eating again, for a few weeks now. Someone asked me, if I can let it go? And the answer is no. I can't. My Samuel, has been diagnosed with something that doesn't go away. Even if he had surgery, he would still have that diagnosis. It isn't something that they can just remove and Tada! He's cured. Nope. It's something that will always be a part of him. It's the way he was programmed to be.
Programmed to be - is how our pediatrician described it to us. How he is made. So, my beautiful bouncy baby boy is perfect just the way he is. Anyone who looks at him can see that. But then there is my brain, that asks questions - that maybe shouldn't be asked. Questions like, his perfect little head is a baby head, what happens when he is a man and it can't grow like the rest of him? Or, how is the pressure and shape of his mild condition going to affect his behaviours and learning abilities. My boy is brilliant - for a 7 month old. And his head is big enough for a 7 month old. What happens if it just isn't big enough anymore? What happens if that time comes? Will the "fine" people say, "oh, wow, didn't see that comin' - gosh that's a bummer." Because I'm wondering and I need to know, if one person - who actually knows what they are talking about - can say to me and promise me, "His head is going to do all the things it needs to and he will never EVER have any disabilities because of his cranio". As Sam's mom - I am asking SOMEONE to promise me this. I think I know what that someone would say to me. I think and I feel inside that no one can promise me this. This is what I can't let go. I can let go of surgery - I almost have. I can't let go of Sam.
Five months ago I worried about getting enough sleep at night - and how the foods I eat will affect my breast milk. I remember trying to decide if I should take a strollercize class with my neighbour. Those days, seem so very, very long ago. Now that I know that there is craniosynostosis, I worry about so many other things that five months ago I never even knew existed. I feel robbed a little bit. I know that many, MANY mothers have it much worse and much harder. I know a few of those mommies quite well. But nobody plans for their child to have a "condition". Can you imagine, filling out your form during pregnancy? Please check a minimum of 2 items:
- blindness
- deafness
- craniosynostosis
- seizures
- cerebral palsy
- autism
- behaviour problems
- cancer
- diabetes
- speech delay
- etc...
Of course you can't. Nobody signs up for anything. You take what you get. And you do the best you can. I'm not mom of the year. I make a lot of mistakes. Sometimes, I don't learn the first or even the second time. But I always come back. So when my child asks me, "will you come back?" The only answer is yes. Mommy always comes back.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
4 teeth and a Shower
Sammington has been working on his 4th tooth since New Year's. I think it is here. I thought that he had cut #4 and #5, but I think #5 is just pressing up into the gum and hasn't cut yet. The poor guy feels so awful - he doesn't sleep properly, he can't eat, and he's so snotty. This past week I have named Teething Week. We have had very VERY little sleep. He's so rundown now.
Teething Week wouldn't have been near as much fun, if I hadn't also been planning a shower for my good friend, Sarah. Thankfully, my aunt and Sarah's mom took care of most of the food. It was all so nice. And I cheated a little with my cupcakes...I ordered the cake part from Sobey's and just decorated them
with fondant and "ears". I premade all of the dots and bows, so that when Mike picked up the cupcakes for me, I could just plop them on!
with fondant and "ears". I premade all of the dots and bows, so that when Mike picked up the cupcakes for me, I could just plop them on!
Speaking of Mike, I have the best husband in the world! Not only did he not complain about 35 strangers in our home, or that I decorated the whole house in pink and white polka dots, but he also helped me get everything ready with the 3 rugrats in tow. He is awesome. I am so lucky - he looked pretty cute yesterday too ;)
The day, I think, went pretty well. I hope Sarah had a nice afternoon. There are some moments in life that become "forever moments" - those times, that 10 years later (and I'm imagining - maybe even 40 years) that become attached to that moment, telling a story, creating a memory. I'm hoping that when Emily is 30 years old, her mom will look back in her baby album and see her baby shower pictures - and smile.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
We've missed you Monkey
When Mackenzie was 18 months old, she had a kidney infection and had to be hospitalized. Mackenzie was always underweight and was also dehydrated at that time too. Poor little thing had such a rough start, it seemed to take her forever to get healthier and stronger. I wish I had pictures to post on here, since she looked like such a dolly in her hospital gown. Anyways, during that time her Uncle Brad and Auntie Michelle came to visit and brought her the cutest little Monkey. She immediately fell in love with "Monkey".
Monkey stayed a close friend for a long time, until Teddy came around. You can probably guess what Teddy was, Kenz has never had the most imaginative names for her 'friends' (she even has a stuffed dog named "Furry Pinkwhite"). She still loved Monkey, but Teddy was the new BFF.
Then Katarina came about and once she was old enough to claim things as hers - she decided that Monkey should be hers. Thankfully, Kenzie didn't put up a fight and let her baby sister have Monkey.
Katarina sleeps with Monkey every night. She loves Monkey. Monkey is a boy, but he wears a dress now. Every morning, Kattie comes down the stairs with all her buddies - including Monkey. She often asks to take him with to the grocery store or where ever else we need to go. I always say no. I knew that if Monkey was left or dropped that we would have trouble, so Monkey usually stays and holds the fort down until we get back. Well, Daddy was in charge on Friday, and Monkey, the lucky guy, got to tag along EVERYWHERE they went.
Then the worst happened. Monkey was missing. We searched in and out of everything and everywhere. I've even made some phone calls to locate Monkey. Poor Kattie was up until 11pm last night, she couldn't sleep. Monkey needed to come home. And I was blaming Daddy. Mommy never would have let Monkey leave the house.
So this morning I'm washing Kattie's bedding and I ran back in her room to grab something. There is Monkey laying on the mattress pad - hanging out all by himself. I asked Kattie where he had been. She then raised a little Dolly diaperbag (which had been laying in the same spot since Saturday) and told me that she had told Monkey to wait in there until she comes back but she forgot about him. I can't even believe she fit him in there. WHEW! I could not be happier to see that little guy! and Whew for Daddy too...he is off the hook for this one ;)
Speaking of monkeys...Here is my little monkey under our kitchen table. All was great until he stood up tall. Then there was lots of tears, "Mommy save me!"
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Cold Soul....where's that HOT CHOCOLATE?!
Today Kattie told me her soul is so cold. I immediately gave her a hug and said, "OH NO!" She told me that I could make it better. So of course, I asked how. She said that she saw a commercial that said Hot Chocolate will warm your soul. I love her.
It has been another busy day. Katarina has been better behaved lately, but Sam has been more unhappy. It always seems to balance out. That darn tooth. He is so very drooly and snotty. He fussed a lot today. Except for when we left the house. It distracted him a little. We ran out today to grab another curtain rod for the great room and look for some pink curtains for my Dolly's room. I am hoping that if we get pink curtains that the need for pink walls will disappear!
Sammington, looked smashing today (can boys look smashing?!) He was wearing light khakis and a fantastic plaid shirt in browns...with a dark brown tee underneath. I also used a dab of Crew hair gel to give him a slight faux hawk. He knows he looked good. Watch out Shallie...
Thankfully, it is EDO Thursday, Mike and I can unwind for the week. We've been watching 'Funny People' over the the last few nights, and hopefully finish it tonight. It's really tricky to watch a movie with Sam. He's just so loud and busy and 7 months old. It's more of a serious movie, but still has it's humour. It's just what I need right now to distract me from worrying and being sad. Both seem to catch up to me at night when I'm tired. Too bad we couldn't solve all of life's problems with hot chocolate, a faux hawk, and maybe Lady Gaga's advice - to just dance, and everything will be ok. It's also too bad that I hadn't noticed sooner that the blind was open in here for the whole world to see. It's a good thing that nothing unusual happened. Ack.
It has been another busy day. Katarina has been better behaved lately, but Sam has been more unhappy. It always seems to balance out. That darn tooth. He is so very drooly and snotty. He fussed a lot today. Except for when we left the house. It distracted him a little. We ran out today to grab another curtain rod for the great room and look for some pink curtains for my Dolly's room. I am hoping that if we get pink curtains that the need for pink walls will disappear!
Sammington, looked smashing today (can boys look smashing?!) He was wearing light khakis and a fantastic plaid shirt in browns...with a dark brown tee underneath. I also used a dab of Crew hair gel to give him a slight faux hawk. He knows he looked good. Watch out Shallie...
Thankfully, it is EDO Thursday, Mike and I can unwind for the week. We've been watching 'Funny People' over the the last few nights, and hopefully finish it tonight. It's really tricky to watch a movie with Sam. He's just so loud and busy and 7 months old. It's more of a serious movie, but still has it's humour. It's just what I need right now to distract me from worrying and being sad. Both seem to catch up to me at night when I'm tired. Too bad we couldn't solve all of life's problems with hot chocolate, a faux hawk, and maybe Lady Gaga's advice - to just dance, and everything will be ok. It's also too bad that I hadn't noticed sooner that the blind was open in here for the whole world to see. It's a good thing that nothing unusual happened. Ack.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
AW-kward..
"Uh hello Kristen, are you Samuel's mom?"
"Yes, I am"
"Dr. Buwembo would like to see Samuel on January 29th, 9am" (what is with all these 9am appts??)
"Ok, we will be there. Do you know if he has seen the scan images or just the report?"
"He has seen the CT - but there are some hard copies of the 3D reconstruction that we're having sent over for your appointment." Hmmmm, sent over from my kitchen? I better say something.
"uhh...yes, I think I have those here. I will bring them."
"Noted."
I'm interested to see what he will say. Dr. Buwembo is a neurosurgeon here in Regina - and is very highly rated. I have read wonderful things about him. Although we went to Calgary, it was not that I doubted his ability. It was that he doesn't specialize in cranial facial and I wanted to see a pediatric neurosurgeon that did. In my ideal little world, Dr. B tells us that no surgery is needed but he'd like to keep an eye on my boy to make sure all is doing as it should. That is what I will hope for. I will try and stay positive!
It's been a busy week of cranio, teething, and I registered Kattiepie for Kindergarten in fall! She is so excited for school. She's so smart she'll do good, but I have a feeling she will have a short attention span and be very, VERY chatty. (Note to someone in particular - Shut it, I know what just went through your head. ps- said with love).
"Yes, I am"
"Dr. Buwembo would like to see Samuel on January 29th, 9am" (what is with all these 9am appts??)
"Ok, we will be there. Do you know if he has seen the scan images or just the report?"
"He has seen the CT - but there are some hard copies of the 3D reconstruction that we're having sent over for your appointment." Hmmmm, sent over from my kitchen? I better say something.
"uhh...yes, I think I have those here. I will bring them."
"Noted."
I'm interested to see what he will say. Dr. Buwembo is a neurosurgeon here in Regina - and is very highly rated. I have read wonderful things about him. Although we went to Calgary, it was not that I doubted his ability. It was that he doesn't specialize in cranial facial and I wanted to see a pediatric neurosurgeon that did. In my ideal little world, Dr. B tells us that no surgery is needed but he'd like to keep an eye on my boy to make sure all is doing as it should. That is what I will hope for. I will try and stay positive!
It's been a busy week of cranio, teething, and I registered Kattiepie for Kindergarten in fall! She is so excited for school. She's so smart she'll do good, but I have a feeling she will have a short attention span and be very, VERY chatty. (Note to someone in particular - Shut it, I know what just went through your head. ps- said with love).
I wasn't able to choose morning or afternoon, they said it's all zoning issues. I really hope she gets morning. Sometimes I worry that the kids that are in the afternoon are the kids whose parents need to sleep in everyday, because everyone stayed up way too late. My apologies to anyone whose kid is in the p.m Kindergarten class.
Viewer Mail
Viewer Mail
I'm impressed, there were a lot of questions for this week's viewer mail - sorry I had to cut a few!
1. Do you soap or shampoo first in a shower? I shampoo, rinse, condition, and then soap while the conditioner's on.
2. Do you blow dry your hair, or just let it air dry, or towel dry? any of those, depending on the day.
3. What is your biggest pet peeve? Yikes I have a few. I think it is a tie between texting someone when you're visiting with me and going offline without saying anything (if we've been talking the whole time).
4. At a movie theatre, which arm rest is yours? the right one when we're with the kids, and the opposite side that Mike is sitting on, if I'm with my boy.
5. If life was a sitcom, what would be some of the episode titles? ooooo, last summer when there was a wasp in the house and it bit me, "The wasp in the Kitchen" or "Ma's visit". Mike had actually said this last summer, that a crew should follow me around all day - because he thinks people would watch. It's never boring here, someone is almost always funny or nude or both.
6. Non kid related, what's bugging you today? My vacuum died and my flatscreen is going black. Both are under 3 years old. Although, in my vacuum's defense - it is used a lot.
7. If you had to pick your child's occupation at this moment what occupation would you pick for them?
Mackenzie - Veterinarian, because she LOVES animals and is so smart.
Katarina - It's not an occupation, but I always think of a little Grandma when I think of Kat, cuz she's so sweet and inventive. But maybe a teacher since she likes to do lots of activities and she's always busy :).
Samuel - that boy's a Football player. He is glued to the tv when it is on, his little jersey looks good on him, and he holds all of his toys like he's running with a football.
1. Do you soap or shampoo first in a shower? I shampoo, rinse, condition, and then soap while the conditioner's on.
2. Do you blow dry your hair, or just let it air dry, or towel dry? any of those, depending on the day.
3. What is your biggest pet peeve? Yikes I have a few. I think it is a tie between texting someone when you're visiting with me and going offline without saying anything (if we've been talking the whole time).
4. At a movie theatre, which arm rest is yours? the right one when we're with the kids, and the opposite side that Mike is sitting on, if I'm with my boy.
5. If life was a sitcom, what would be some of the episode titles? ooooo, last summer when there was a wasp in the house and it bit me, "The wasp in the Kitchen" or "Ma's visit". Mike had actually said this last summer, that a crew should follow me around all day - because he thinks people would watch. It's never boring here, someone is almost always funny or nude or both.
6. Non kid related, what's bugging you today? My vacuum died and my flatscreen is going black. Both are under 3 years old. Although, in my vacuum's defense - it is used a lot.
7. If you had to pick your child's occupation at this moment what occupation would you pick for them?
Mackenzie - Veterinarian, because she LOVES animals and is so smart.
Katarina - It's not an occupation, but I always think of a little Grandma when I think of Kat, cuz she's so sweet and inventive. But maybe a teacher since she likes to do lots of activities and she's always busy :).
Samuel - that boy's a Football player. He is glued to the tv when it is on, his little jersey looks good on him, and he holds all of his toys like he's running with a football.
* After laying Sam down for his nap, I came out to see what Kat was doing. She did this with her little Barbie kids...perhaps I need to rethink my choice for her occupation or maybe it's just right ;).
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
up, uP, UP, DOWN, Down, down.
Yesterday was supposed to be Viewer Mail day. Viewer Mail will be tomorrow instead (hopefully). I should know better than to make a plan. The Regina General Hospital called me yesterday morning, in response to my message requesting to see the CT images. They said that they could burn me a copy of the disk and I could pick it up at any time or they would mail it out. I couldn't wait for the mail. I planned to pick it up immediately - just as soon as Samsam woke up for the day. He was sleeping in, since he had been up most of the night.
Samuel has been working on cutting his 4th tooth since New Year's. The boy is suffering. He is drooly and miserable - doesn't know what he wants. That tooth needs to come out for him and for Mommy and Daddy.
As soon as he woke, I bundled up the kiddos and went to the RGH. Finding parking was a nightmare, and then we walked (for what seemed a long time) in the cold - holding Kattie's hand and carrying the bucket that Sam really shouldn't be in anymore. We made our way to the X ray reception, that is where they had my disk. Finally, I would have a solid conclusion!
We made it home an hour later from when we left the house. I was so anxious and the kids were being so good. As soon as I had their coats off, I popped the dvd in the drive and sat down. It took me a minute to figure out the program they use for the scan. There are 216 images. The first image shows the report. "No intracranial abnormalities" - that's great. "Note the fusion in the metopic suture resulting with trigonocephaly" - hmmmm, interesting and very assertive wording. Then I flipped through many images that didn't show me anything. All of the pictures on the disk were of his brain. It looked fantastic - perfectly healthy, but it didn't prove to me anything about fusion or trigonocephaly. I looked everywhere and couldn't find those 3D images that I wanted. It said in the report that 3D reconstruction was done - but where was it?!
Samuel has been working on cutting his 4th tooth since New Year's. The boy is suffering. He is drooly and miserable - doesn't know what he wants. That tooth needs to come out for him and for Mommy and Daddy.
As soon as he woke, I bundled up the kiddos and went to the RGH. Finding parking was a nightmare, and then we walked (for what seemed a long time) in the cold - holding Kattie's hand and carrying the bucket that Sam really shouldn't be in anymore. We made our way to the X ray reception, that is where they had my disk. Finally, I would have a solid conclusion!
We made it home an hour later from when we left the house. I was so anxious and the kids were being so good. As soon as I had their coats off, I popped the dvd in the drive and sat down. It took me a minute to figure out the program they use for the scan. There are 216 images. The first image shows the report. "No intracranial abnormalities" - that's great. "Note the fusion in the metopic suture resulting with trigonocephaly" - hmmmm, interesting and very assertive wording. Then I flipped through many images that didn't show me anything. All of the pictures on the disk were of his brain. It looked fantastic - perfectly healthy, but it didn't prove to me anything about fusion or trigonocephaly. I looked everywhere and couldn't find those 3D images that I wanted. It said in the report that 3D reconstruction was done - but where was it?!
I called Radiology again. I knew I was pushing my luck. Thankfully the woman on the other end was very nice, she said she would do the same if it were her child. She said she didn't know why the images weren't included on the disk but she found some "beautiful" hard copies that I could have. I was ecstatic! I called Mike and asked him to pick them up on his way home from work, since Sam was now down for his nap.
In the meantime, the Cranial Facial nurse called me from Calgary. She apologized that she missed us on Thursday and was looking forward to meeting me. She said that she wanted to give us a great big hug for all we had been through, and was thrilled with our news that he was fine without surgery! She then said, "I'm so happy that it worked out this way, X-rays can be so inconclusive!" X-rays?!? I told her we didn't have an X-ray. She said that she thought the report was written based on an X-ray. I told her no...it was a CT. She paused and said, "oh - those usually aren't wrong."
The craniocoaster is picking up speed again and I was anxious to see those 3D images. As soon as Mike walked in the door, I grabbed them from him. They are big. They look like the big X-ray sheets (ironically) that you see on tv in a doctor show. They are beautiful, she was right. He is the sweetest little skeleton I have ever seen. And he has cranio.
You can see how clear his open sutures are, and then in front (the metopic) it is clearly fused. You can see how prominent his ridge is in the left picture. And also, this is hard on Mommy's heart, but in the right picture it does appear that there is mild trigonocephaly. Regina's not so stupid afterall. I can very much understand why they wrote what they did in the report.
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